ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
People in love make me want to vomit
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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