I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
