yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
