Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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