Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
