I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
