but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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