Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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