Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I had to cum in my sink.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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