What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I'm always down for nudity.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
