So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
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