Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
