I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
