My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
