So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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