Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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