epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize