I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
