WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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