I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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