he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
