Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
