U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
