Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
