you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
