i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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