I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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