i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
