You work out of a Hotel?
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
