i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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