i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
nutella sex= disaster
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
