I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
