he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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