can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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