Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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