Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
