sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Randomize
