When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
