Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
If I die, sorry about rent.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
