I wish i was in the wii world.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize