We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
