and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
