Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
