Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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