It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
