false alarm. still invincible.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize