We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
It was confusing and full of hummus
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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