he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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