I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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