Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
