Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
